chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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