Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
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