Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
he had hair everywhere except his balls
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