we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
