should my penis look like a turkey
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
