I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Randomize
