Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
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