Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
