My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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