Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize