soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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