lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
