i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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