We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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