your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
