i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Barsexuality is the new black.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
