Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
