come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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