He uses pillows to masturbate.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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