yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
