Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
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