i jhust puked up my retainher.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
