Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
