sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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