did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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