girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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