She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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