The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
