More tranny stories later!
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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