You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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