I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Randomize
