i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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