i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
