all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
