All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
