put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
