It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Randomize
