Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
