Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
