what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
