So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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