Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
NoShamevember. You game?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
