I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
