So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
