How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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