I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
