Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
