Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
