So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
