Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
