her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
