Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize